I am writing this blog in real time. Recently, we've been having a lot of trouble with our 3 year old and sleeping at night. After the night I had with her last night and the fact that she's been averaging maybe 6 hours of sleep for the past week each night, we are in need of a change. She has been a complete nightmare during that day due to lack of sleep at night. I recently listened to my favorite mommy podcast "Big Fat Positive", and I got the idea to do check-ins after bedtime to hopefully encourage my 3 year old to sleep. One of the moms did that with her 3 year old son and after being consistent every night, she does not have an issue anymore with bedtime. Tonight is our first time trying it. After each check-in, I will give you an update.
Bedtime: okay, so I just put her to bed. She screamed at the door crying of course. Like she always does. She can't leave the room because there's a child lock on the doorknob. So instead she bangs on the door. My husband read somewhere that warm milk is like a melatonin for kids, and is recommended to help them sleep. So I told my daughter I will be back in 5 minutes, and got the milk ready. I should have warmed it up sooner, like before bedtime, but that's okay. Pretty soon, I will go in her room, do her first "check-in", give her some milk and then tell her I will be back. My goal is to keep it positive and brief. The next check-in will be 10 minutes. I will add 5 minutes between each check-in until she's asleep.
First Check-In: Not a bad first check-in. She was very excited I was in her room and she was even more excited that I had milk. I was in there no more than 2 minutes. We had a nice conversation about what we are going to do tomorrow morning, she drank some warm milk and then I told her I will be back in 10 minutes with more milk. She laid down with no problem but as soon as I closed the door, she ran to the door and started screaming my name. I honestly expect this to happen every time I leave. BUT the cry only lasted maybe 1 minute. Not too bad.
Second Check-In: She did not cry as much when I left. I was in her room for about one minute, she had a couple sips of milk, and after her last sip she actually said goodbye to me like she was okay with me leaving. She of course cried when I left, but the cry only lasted 10ish seconds and she went back into her bed to lay down. That is MAJOR PROGRESS, compared to the last few nights. I am at this point that I feel hopeful that I only have to do one more check in. The next check-in will be in 15 minutes. I will bring milk again and check the monitor before I go in because it is possible that she is still awake. BUT she may also be asleep. I'll know more in 15 minutes. The last time I went in, she was still pretty perky and excited, so she may not feel "drowsy" yet. 15 minutes without me going in, may be what she needs to start feeling drowsy.
Third Check-In: SHE'S ASLEEP! What a relief! I couldn't tell on the monitor very well, so I went in to check on her anyways with the flashlight on my phone and the milk. She was curled up in her covers, white noise still on and passed out. Thank goodness. I can't even begin to explain what a relief this is. Last night was so miserable, that I ended up sleeping with her. The check-ins must of brought comfort to her, that she was easily able to fall asleep, knowing I was coming back. Now time to relax, finish some housework (we're moving in 3 weeks), and maybe treat myself to a margarita!
I know these check-ins may not be this successful every night, but doing it for the first time with a 3 year old and she responded so well to them, I will definitely be doing this every night now until she doesn't need it anymore.
Have a wonderful evening and thank you so much for reading!
Susana
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